Thought I should let you know that there is an EXACT copy of chapter 11: Escape on a website called Booksie.com By CTPlatt, but it was posted in 2017.
Great world building so far. Concept is unique to me and the characters are easy enough to visualize based on their descriptions. Just watch out for comma splices and minor syntax issues moving forward and you've got yourself a story!
It's entertaining, but I have several problems with the main characters and dialogue.The main characters don't question anything. They suddenly transmigrated to another world and didn't question anything. They just said, "Oh, let's Dr. Stone this [thing]," and that's it. There are no hypotheses, internal monologues, questioning, or anything like that. Also, I feel like the characters don't try to change the world; they only try to make money, especially given how they act towards it. Apart from the blatant [racial discrimination] that Poul receives, they don't have opinions about anything else.They are like:Oh, look, the streets smell like [unpleasant thing that smells bad]. Well, it is what it is.Oh, look, people look at me as if I were an [intellectually challenged person] because I don't know these useless and overly complicated manners. Well, I guess it's my bad. I'll learn.Oh, look, races are separated by hair color and skin color. Well, I don't care, I'm not going to investigate it. I'll just work for 300 chapters to produce more air brakes.I understand that the characters have to adapt, and it's the smart choice, but I feel that the MCs don't have any conviction towards their past lives and 21th Century beliefs. They act as if they were commoners in that world that suddenly gained knowledge from another world, instead of actually being highly educated transmigrators from our era. They just accept things, and we aren't explained why they accept it. It's just weird, and it feels like they are empty. I don't know how to describe it.The dialogues are sometimes too specific or weirdly structured. Instead of something being explained through the narrator, the characters explain it. But sometimes, it's obviously structured so that we, as readers, can understand it, which makes the dialogue weird because nobody would talk like that. It's like they are reading a presentation/script.Also, the MCs act too respectful, let's better say "agreeable
Just finished Chapter 47 and am current on the novel so I figured now would be a good time to submit this review. Idczhen has shown numerous times that he understands a great plot with amazing characters time and time again and Crowd Control is no exception! Please note that there are extremely minor spoilers ahead.Writing Quality: 4/5 - Zhen has improved LEAPS and BOUNDS compared to Luck is a Charm, but there are some minor tense issues that could have made a sentence flow better and be read easier. Besides this, the quality of writing in Crowd Control is definitely far above the average of any story on WN. Stability of Updates: 5/5 - Not taking into account the uh... hiatus, Zhen has always been consistent on his daily uploads. Nothing much to say here. Story Development: 5/5 - The futuristic world of Earth in 2089 in Crowd Control is your pretty standard and typical MMORPG setting; however, that is pretty much where the comparisons end. The story so far is very interesting and compelling. Get in for a long haul, because this story is paced slow, but at the same time, the plot is strong, really drawing the reader in.Character Design: 5/5 - Lei Zhen, our MC, comes from pretty standard background, deceased parents, he's all on his own. His younger sister has been in a coma for a very long time and that is his drive. His role as a Crowd Controller is a unique class and very little is known. I am very interested to see how he will develop. The current supporting cast is extremely well developed. Relationships are already being tested and it is soo juicy and dramatic and I cannot wait!World Background: 5/5 - The game, Magnolia, takes an interesting approach toward the MMO genre. Having been the #1 VRMMORPG for the last 4 years, our MC is the first person to stumble upon the Main Story, completely changing the game as everyone knows it! The established lore is deep and Zhen has done an excellent job at creating unique spins for this wonderful virtual world. Don't take this to mean that he has ignored the futuristic 2089 either! The real world has been explored a decent amount at this current point as well. Overall: 4.8/5 - Crowd Control has everything that you hate to love, love to hate, and all the things you love to love! This is an excellently written novel with one of the best designed MMO game I've ever read about. The cast is diverse and still growing, each bringing great conversation and dynamic reactions on the entire app. This is absolutely a must read novel!
its really good i gotta spam this so i can post this reviewi gotta spam this so i can post this reviewi gotta spam this so i can post this review
More please . More please . More please . More please . More please .More please .More please .More please . More please . More please .More please . More please
Author-san, I loved your previous novel, that's why Im willing to give this a try, but before I do, I have a question, will this stroy have NTR? I hope not. :(
This is a gem, the best gem. Please someone pick it up again, stop getting new novel and drop the old but gold novel. Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please Please
So far im 150 chapters in and I've learned that China all around is an extremely horrible place to live just my opinions I mean besides being black and always having to read about people make fun of the MC for having dark skin and the corruption of how doctors who are ignorant get in through connections and how you have to give a doctor more money on top of the already expensive treatment fees if you want them to DO THEIR JOB CORRECTLY and the constant peer pressure of ruining your lungs by smoking and the misogynistic views of women not to mention what china is doing right now to Muslims/people with middle eastern looks china would be DECENT but you know to bad all of those things are how the author describes china or are something that has been shown in real life also the MC is a bit dull he has no motivation for better things in life which is really unrealistic in this realistic story he constantly gives away half to 1/3 of his pay to people that don't even need it for "cultivating good relationships" and for half of the story half the stuff he has is borrowed from some rich lady IDK I just feel like its another one of those cookie cutter MC's that basically only have 2 emotions or do 2 things without caring about other things which is a bit retarded cause no matter how long they've lived they'll still have desires and for some reason none of these mc's on webnovel whether it be realistic or fantasy genre don't have basic human nature apparently they've transcended that or for some reason just because they got a system their self control or reasoning is better than millions to billions of people sorry for my rant but yh this story is pretty good I do hope to see MC get married and have a kid.
Alright review time. I just finished the first 40 chapters and let me tell you... I am absolutely in grossed in the world building of the story. I am going to spend the next couple hours reading the last 20 chapters and I will write more at that point but let me tell you the story is funny, witty, and a good overall fun time. I think it’s worth your time to read it I think you will enjoy it and all I can say is I am more than likely going to be daily reviewing this just like 48 hours in a day.
Hey everyone it's your shameless author here! For return readers, yes I know I have a million books running, but I'm planning on focusing on this novel for at least a few months. I'm aiming for one or two chapters a day, every day. Wish me luck and love you guys!