Haven’t read yet but love tye concept please don’t drop suiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
a good concept and story ruined by its translation.
if you ever read saving 80.000 gold in another world, its almost similar.
but the travel between 2 world need to meet a certain condition in this novel.
if you can stand the multiple mistakes and weird translation, you need to drain your brain thinking the words to make some sentence makes sense lol
overall yeah a nice story, ruined by it translation
The idea was perfect. I want to see where this would develop if you would continue writing it. Although the characters could use some work, I liked the premise. Not many people take something like NTR and try to make a good story out of it. Usually, most people just through a person's feelings out of the window and just end it there in NTRs. Respect for trying! And I want to see more.
Spoiler Review:
Main-Character used his [calm mind] ability after talking to his girl. Even though he himself was calm, his thoughts really weren't. Serenity isn't just not shouting and screaming. Just because you aren't visibly violent
whether verbally or physically, doesn't mean you are at peace or calm.
Owen was anything but calm at that moment, even after using his ability.
He ignored her reactions and stuttering as she tried to complete a sentence and was telling whatever he came up with- without noticing her obvious stressed and shocked state of mind. He was just trying to come out morally superior to her OR he tried to rush it- either reasons heavily implicate he himself was not calm at all.
Regarding Jack, is that really all he wanted out of her? Did he dedicate himself to her for a year just for a quicky? He knew all the tricks about social dynamics and that was his conclusion? Don't get me wrong, he got me pretty riled up and I hated his guts but she let him choose her clothes, the way she acts, how to be more feminine- and you're telling me they never ONCE hung out? Or at least let Jack be near enough to drug her? It just doesn't fit- just as much as Owen being "calm" yet not listening to her at all.
But- Like any story, nothing is perfect. And here, you have an option to edit your previous chapters. I hope you will someday come back here and make this work since I like video games and system stuff and, of course, Anti-NTR.
Best regards, and good luck-
Hazy.
Nice start. It gives me player one vibes, and the general atmosphere of your writing is pretty upbeat and bright, it’s good vibes. First person is pretty difficult to pull of but your doing a good job so far
I only read the first chapter and it bored me to death this book truly isn't interesting!
HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM HAREM
The synopsis looks good, ill try this out when its available.
140 word requirement.....
anyone know what chapter in raw this guy finally enter in sect of House wan Jian? -.- I read like up to 200+ in raw and still could not find it. It is very boring because translation is super slow despite having 2900 Chapter. if 1 chapter a day. You will die before you complete the series. 1 year - 360 days. So u can only get 360 chapter in 1 year or LESS. I say Less. maybe 300 chapter in 1 year. So it will take 10 Years for translator to catch up to 2900 Chapter. I dont know if i can make it ill be 62 in 10 years.
No, I'm not shameless. It is only shameless if it is not true and I dare say that if you know what you came for, my novel will provide you with entertainment and delightful surprises. Thus, I give myself five stars.(But really I'm just another shameless author giving himself five stars to boost his overall rating *yikes*)
I read this story and I'm impressed by the way it has been written.
It has very small details that an individual faces in his /her life.
This story has all mixture of sadness , joy , romance , death etc.
Great book Please join me to support my book