Okay so, cards on the table, I haven’t read this story yet. I gave a rating just to comment cause I’m not sure where else I should put this but here goes: Dear Author, darling, honey, sweetheart you need to fix the grammar in your summary. It doesn’t flow well and sounds mighty awkward this can drive people off your story making them less inclined to even give it a go. Don’t get me wrong I think it’s super cool of you to put your stuff out there for others to read this is just a tip for reference. Good luck!