Zoe_Tagboto
Hey Author! The story was excellent, a MC who was tired of life getting a hope to survive in the cruel world! The grammar was good too, there isn't anything much except that I personally felt the World background explanation was a bit lacking. Well I don't know for sure since you may have plan to explain it in future chapters. anyway It was a good read, I will come back when the novel would have more chapters.
great story highly intriguing kept me waiting for every next chapter with great anticipation and also the character design isn't very bland.
This is my first novel, so please be forgiving with the story. If you have any suggestion, crirics, or anything, I'd love to have them. Seriously though I need them it's kinda dead without the lol
Is it just me or is the picture is a knock-off of the my vampire system I mean I don't mind but I don't know its kind of funny ? you just deleted the mask and changed the name (againI don't really mind it's ok as long as this is good ) and I like the Idea it's original (I think but never seen it in mylife)
So I know the author is extremely sensitive in hearing negative reviews, but I have to be honest. As much as the premise does to serve the fans with things they (including myself) would like (such as VRMMO concepts, Romance, Strong powers etc.) It has a very important issue of execution.
From the first chapter, I can quote what others have been saying which boils down to it "being all over the place". It tells us what is going on rather than showing, but in a very loose method. It does not keep a focus and ultimately, becomes uncomfortable to read. Each chapter should have a purpose. The *flow* and *transitioning* of each sentence and paragraph should be strong and easy to follow through.
What I would advise is for the author to look at *how* other authors write their books. Yes, I say "how" becasue I feel that the writing style needs to change. It can get exhausting, especially if a lot of chapters have been completed. Let's say you learned a lot from other books and finally came up with a better style – it'd take a long time to fix all of it. I understand.
However, if that's the case I would get an editor to help you out. There's plenty of authors who would do that in the discord for Webnovel/RoyalRoad. For other works, I'd analyze how Sword Art Online, Rising of the Shield Hero or Library of Heaven's Path wrote their chapters and their style of conveying their messages to their audience.
Plot wise, make sure when writing a scene to imagine how the readers will feel about that scene when comparing it to the *previous chapters*. For example, if the main cast fought and won against a guild of people but then suffers against several weaker hunters later on, there should be a reason *why* they are struggling in the very least, or else it will leave them confused.
Overall, great job with nearly 3 million views and good luck with the rest!
Spam botqwertyndowpamsbdjsowlnsbdhdisowken
Spam botqwertyndowpamsbdjsowlnsbdhdisowken
Spam botqwertyndowpamsbdjsowlnsbdhdisowken
Spam botqwertyndowpamsbdjsowlnsbdhdisowken
Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it Love it love it love it x ♾
The story is interesting especially its all about mechs. In this story our protagonist can buiod and pilot a mech which is another intersting addition to the plot. It is like mech touch but the mech designer can actually pilot his creation. Still starting here hope for more chapter.
Don't read this book and waste your time.That MC has no Common Sense at all.Gains any knowledge almost automatically like a world's best hacker and world's best martial artist.An assassin comes to kill him and then begs for mercy. WTF ?? ? Has beautiful girlfriend, but It's not because I am jealous that I rated this book 1 ⭐.(N jealousy at all)On serious note, if we could have 0 stars, I would rate this 0 stars.
the idea of the story is interesting, the development not so much, since there are some stupid and unnecessary dramas, the system can be ordered so that a better presentation, the "MC" is meh, it leaves much to be desired, in conclusion, with a good edition, plus the elimination of unnecessary and stupid dramas, change the attitude of the "MC" a bit, because his attitude is pathetic, give a better order to the system, the history would be polished and he would reach the top 3.
Hey there!Good day for writing! If you wanted to see whether you can get paid by distributing the current work or getting financial support by writing new work, you might want to contact [email protected]. A brief introduction, some sample chapters or links will be appreciated when reaching out.
I really like this book. There are some spelling/grammar errors but not enough to hinder my reading. I feel a strong connection to the main character when I read the author’s written words. I feel his sadness and anger and hopelessness. It makes me want to somehow reach out and hug him comfortingly. Thanks for making such a heartfelt book author. I look forward to future updates...
