Okay, I love villain novels. At first, I doubted if the mc is really going to be evil just because of the way he acted and his thoughts about Elizabeth and Su, but I stand corrected. He's more of the scary kind of villain cuz it ain't the, "Oh, I'm a big bad guy,". He just does. at the same time, Seth seems like the one who'll say, "It's going to be alright," whilst simultaneously choking you to death. So far, I'm digging it
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Doorbound combines heart-pounding action with deep character exploration, has elements of horror entwined with mystery and thriller. good start!
Alright to be brutally honest here's what I think Firstly I understand you probably had chatgpt or another AI book writing app to help improve writing clarity in your chapters however you should probably remove the sub topic like stuff u write before a segment in the chapter for example in chapter 5 "kuromoni family training grounds" " observeing the weakness" in my opinion those things cause a bridge in readingSecondly I think the pacing is really off, to go more on that I believe in some parts which should have been spaced more were spaced less and some parts which should be been spaced less were space more which kind of messed up the book spacing— if you are using an Ai writing platform to aid you as i suspected I suggest you try asking them to help you write in segments and not the whole thing at once as it would probably go a long way for book pacing Thirdly some point of views would have been nice like the first chapter the boy Daiko or Daito can't remember him well seemed to bully him far to excessively for no apparent reason making it way to unrealistic considering we don't have a clue why or if he just had personality issues because in my honest opinion I feel like if an actual person was the top of the school or sum like that he probably wouldn't care much about someone like the mc tho he could still bully him it can never, in my opinion be as excessive as getting him expelled and still calling people to beat him From a book I had previously read i think it was time fist they did a good job in explaining why the protagonist was bullied as much as he wasLastly this book is probably a lot more better than i give it credit so whatever i say and rate in this throwaway comment of mine is not a theory but a personal opinion which should not affect any readers view of the book
"Okay sir, I do anything for that, anything ...."
Devil
"The answer of number one is a foolish human," said Mamat.
imagination, because their life is only
"Ku ku ku, you definitely want to make an interesting villain huh? Ku ku ku." Jester laughing with his typical laugh.
"Hyung, its so beautiful in here" JK
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culprit2 "no worries bro, we can still play with her"