So firstly I just wanna state that this is actually a good novel, could even be great. I have issues with a few things though. 1stly too much exposition, way too much exposition. This novel could actually benefit from breaking up and expanding the first few chapters to flush out more intricate details and better character development and such. I feel as though the Author loves this novel and has a great many ideas he wants to implement and it shows by coming off as if he's rushing the development of the story. There's a distinct difference between withholding information and slowly trickling it in after hooking the reader with great action beats and giving information dumps to get critical information out of the way. There are some grammar errors as well as spelling flaws, but by far the biggest issue is the exposition. Sometimes it even rips the reader out of immersion of the story. We gain information that could easily be told to us in more creative ways.
Overall the author is creative and even though this is a systems novel, I feel they do a great job of utilizing it as a tool rather than the main focus. The main focus is the world, and there's thought put into this world, which is why the exposition drives me up a wall because you are taking away from truly expanding the beauty of the world. I know this may seem like a rant or bashing but I'm only being tough because you gotta gem here, slow down and polish that baby. If you establish that beginning right all that juicy tid bits i know your rushing to get to will pay off even more.
