Hi this is Brandon gould I just read the first three chapters of your book and I am also a up and coming writer I will give your book a review if you go over and look at my book Demonsong and give it a review Of the chapters I read the story seems to be moving at a good speed, you should try to make more paragraphs so it is a bit more readable and if someone is supposed to be talking either to themselves or other people you put "" so that symbolizes that they are talking I did like it seems very interesting and unique