I can say the story is going well and interesting, I can see the author is putting her best. Although, the chapters are short but I don't have a problem with that. Also, a connection with the character and story would be amazing, although the story is starting, we want more suspense, action and something that would keep us wanting more. I hope Crystal, would be able to overcome the trials as the story proceed. Kudos author and Good luck. To everyone - Give the story a try ? let's go!!!
This is a story with potential. I like the plot, I like the characters, and I like the world background. However, there is one thing that really leaves much to be desired: the writing quality. The words themselves are ok. They are not being spelled wrong. It's the awkward sentence structure you can frequently find, the missing words and the words not fitting the context that really lower the quality of this story. The sad thing is that these problems could be prevented easily. The author needs to do some editing, or get a beta to do it. That way this story could really be up there.
"Just punch him over and over, but don't you dare kill him, you will pay 10 times of the payment."
This world is divided into 2 world, first human world and secondly of course our world.
With the silence of the class, Mamat begin to read the prayer.
Devil is a creature of Dark creation and a servant of its own creator.
BAE-Before Apocalyptic Era. AAE- After Apocalyptic Era.
The new foster home was much nicer then the last one and even had rather cool people running it. Of course, fate was once again unkind as it threw yet another curveball towards the young 9 year old boy. This time it was in the form of the residents, 3 teens (two boys and one girl) who had been in the foster home for more 3 years. They had grown bored of the tedious life and while they liked their foster parents, they weren't too big on other people who moved in.
"Stay down Croc before this gets worse for you," Cap said as cracked his neck.
The years had gone by quickly and training had flown by so quickly the brothers Titus and Darius had worked and trained their martial arts learned under Sensei Shugo they had even competed in the junior year competition for light contact fighting showing that their district had the potential to produce more skilled fighters the boys were ranked moste talented at their respective age levels being with Darius being 7 and Titus being 6 and barely their first year learning someone elses arts they dominated their age group and ended up fightiing one another at the end with the older brothe becoming the victor yet still sharing the victory with his brother.
"So..." Bruce started as he watched Natasha smile down at the picture, discreetly glancing Naruto's way as she did, "Did you and…uh, well…um-"
"Yes." she whispered. I could tell she was new to this perhaps only done this for a couple of months or so. "Come take a seat here I'll call someone to come help you meanwhile could I have your address, so I can speak to your cousin?" I nodded. I told her my address but warned her that my cousin would be either sleeping or sleeping with someone. When she left a shorter man with a fabulous moustache came in, he asked me a few questions about my cousin -Libby- like what had happened when I was with her and how long has this been going on for and why I didn't come to them sooner?