I like this novel, it is interesting to see how the characters develop and change as they go through different situations. I look forward to more chapters. I will leave 5 stars.
I haven't read all the chapters, but I'm especially enjoying the world-building and regularly irregular jokes. Interesting story! I wonder what Marcus's ultimate success shall entail.
Love the story so far it's really funny and it make me think of real Chinese cultivation novels how so far it makes good points about it that makes me laugh a lot like really that what it's all about and you saying it that way make it more fun and comical about the whole story I really can't wait for more the author is very great at what he does I hope more stories like this come out because I'm really looking forward to it and people you should read it if you have not what are you doing here reading this go look at story come on go read it what are still doing here waste your life reading this what me to do some I'm not here to Intertan you the story is so go click the read button a enjoy something wonderfulgo read you'll love it go read you'll love it go read you'll love it go read you'll love it go read you'll love it go read you'll love it
interesting story. Keep up111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111
Positive points: Your grammar is good and the sounds of objects breaking or even the sound of the clock is an interesting point in your narrative form.Negative points: The chapters are very short; The story is very fast; It's lack consistency in the narration; The main character, so far, has no depth and no interesting personality; his friendship with Dimitri is strange; and Mr. Golden must die (yes, I hate characters who are mysterious to cause suffering in MC).General Rating: You should pay more attention to the consistency of your story, for example, in the first and second chapter in which you present the main character is not satisfactory, the main character is an empty person, very unreal, being very difficult as a reader identify with this type of character. And the conversation between MC and Mr. Golden is annoying and unreal, I wanted to kill MC in that moment.From what I understand, you're creating a story where MC is an innocent fool to become a powerful and ruthless "man."However, I thought you could work more on the personality of the MC before training, showing a little of your day-to-day and prolonging the training time a bit more. In this case as you have already published the chapters, I make a suggestion, put flash back on the past of the MC, as he was an innocent fool or a fool easily fooled, also help some flash backs training, like a scavenger hunt or even an enemy made in this prison.Another point is that you should better develop the world of your history, for there is nothing to be able to identify in what year the story goes, what are the political powers of this world, what kind of firepower does this The world has, what the geography of the world today ... That kind of thing.I know it's your first story, but I was honest because when I wrote my first story I had no review that put these types of reviews for me, so the story became so chaotic and terrible that I deleted all chapters to reform this story someday.Do not be angry with me for the Review, I'm just being honest, you can even disregard my opinion if you want.
Hey Webnovelist!Good day for writing! If you wanted to see whether you can get paid by distributing the current work or getting financial support by writing new work, you might want to email [email protected]. We are mainly looking for adventurous novels (Fantasy, Sci-fi, Paranormal Urban, Action, Thriller/Suspense, Game Fiction). A brief introduction along with a few samples or links will be appreciated when reaching out. You might be our next top writer!
Uhh hey author, do you have a discord server or a place where we can discuss your novels and stuff?? and another thing but can anyone tell me the cultivation stages from first?? I kind of forgot which chapter it was in...
I don't want to bash you in, like the other guy did on his review. i know this is your first novel and your still improving but am gonna have to drop.Your mc is just way to annoying, i really did try and read more, but at this point am just skimming through chapters.(Mc problems)1: The fact the he actually paid for the wand that was disposable was just bad, he could have still made excuses or try to haggle over the wand, you think he would learn a thing or two over haggling because he grew in that type of environment, but no, He didn't.2: Some what the same problem, butcher guy was to ripping him off but as soon as he thought that the butcher guy was helping him with the girl, he dropped everything thing because he thought he was a "man of culture" for helping him with the girl.3: MOST ANNOYING PROBLEM OF THEM ALL! Annoying simp mc, Jesus Christ the first pretty girl that he meets he instantly goes monke mode for her, I can't imagine what would happen when he meets someone like a Princess or a Queen, that look more beautiful than her or some other higher being that's more beautiful.
One of the best kingdom-building novels that I have read. MC's character and personality is suited for the story, ruthless and calculating.
Ju-just a week guys I promise, another dropped video game novel that went into hiatus to the ever towering list Can I get an F in chat ...................
The entire story is great its just the update speed is about as fast as a sleepy turtle at the time of this review. Overall the characters are great and the world has been explained for the most part early on in slight manners or info dumps so you have a framework to go on and the way that the systen works is truly new to me who is a person who very much likes system novels so this is a slow but great book which would be great for everyone.
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