The system of kael and the story telling is damn awesome. The kael and the lira fighting spirit there conversation is litterally killing. When he will meet main lead female.
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Good start to a fanfiction, keep at it. Have you thought about doing a novel like MEDITERRANEAN HEGEMON OF ANCIENT GREECE ? Just war and kingdom building without fantasy?( Pasted from google, forgot the name)
This is sick! why would a father want to eat his son? I hope to see how Devon would execute his plan out with Khish
The story is great with everything, the MC is a bit cocky but anyone with that much power would be so pretty realistic, the world building is also quite good. the only bad thing is the fights lasting a dozen chapters each and while some are entertaining, most just feel too stretched out.
I love the plot of the story as it’s very unique. In this review I will give small spoilers that are related to the characters and not the plot(unless it’s mentioned in the summary but not elaborate on to my liking). I will also have a kind of summary at the end for those that just don’t want to read this whole thing.So first off the story follows 5 characters with one being the MC and the rest being the group of people the Mc is depending on to escape. The group of 4 are quite a unique bunch in the sense that their personalities are different from each other. Im pretty sure that a lot of people who decide to read this story will like at least one of these 4. I wouldn’t exactly say that their interactions with each other make the story more entertaining but I would definitely say that it makes the story more engaging or compelling, making me want to see more. I will say that currently I feel that the author needs to have a chapter where the reader gets to see the thoughts, goals, and desires of the characters in relation to their situation. Although the author does a good job at making the reader understand who the characters are as a person through telling and showing. Though there’s only 18 chapters at the moment of writing this so I believe that this problem will be addressed.I personally hate how unsemetrical the Mc body is, but it’s well described and the Mc is quite the horror monster. As for the other characters, there’s one that’s well described but the rest are more glossed over but are decent enough in my opinion (but I don’t remember much of what their discription were except one cause that character seems to be the same one on the cover.) The pace of the story is, well I don’t know what to say about it currently. I do have opinions on it but I feel conflicted on what to say. Though the world building comes naturally and is interesting but also comes in bulk. As for how detailed the story is, I would say it’s in a good area of not being too much or too little in general.Characters=goodVeraity of characters(the ones we follow in specific)=amazingCharacter development= To early to say (as of writing this there’s only 18 chapters)Horror= the author knows how to describe horror monstersPlot development= unique and interesting The characters perspectives= we get a good idea on who they are as a person but there’s a lack of seeing their thoughts on their situation.Chapter releases= very inconsistent at the moment and the chapter length are somewhat inconsistent but generally short
its interesting and good, but it has repeating paragraphs.
This is a very interesting story good job author
I hope y'all like the book, I'd try my best to update as much as I can, please vote for me and feel free to comment
I'm not shameless; you're shameless.Let me be honest for a second. The main character isn't unimaginably strong, definitely powerful, for sure in the realms of overpowered, but she doesn't steamroll every fight and there are countless people stronger than her.Secondly, The main character makes mistakes—a lot of them. Life is a learning experience, and our protagonist is TERRIBLE at taking notes.Third, There are bugs in your skin. Goodluck.
Hey there, your useless trash author's here! I just finished drawing his first Character Design, like I'm really really bored so I tried drawing it and yeah here we go, I just finished Iwasaki Yuto's first look.
Wow! bro what a story. Mostly perfect grammar and I love the way you write, the build up to the story. It's beautifully paced, making for totally an immersive reading. There are however a few errors of note. In your synopsis you mentioned, " ...the universe was not done with him and made him awaken in another world. You could have said instead, "...brought him back in another world. On to the chapter I you state that Aiden was perplexed by 'the lack of support from the police'. Regardless of how vicious or how much of a menace to society his victim was, the police will just consider anyone who kills this rotten apple as a criminal and not as a saviour. That's standard police rational, it's just black and white in their reasoning there are no grey areas. In that regard you might want to say instead, that Aiden was perplexed by the lack of impartiality by the police, as they had already convinced themselves that he was guilty of the crime without bothering to give him the benefit of the doubt. Otherwise... excellent writing bro. Keep up the very high standard.