Okay, I just finished going through the chapters, and I’ve got to say. I’m really intrigued. There’s something about the way the story mixes normal school life with this weird, almost eerie atmosphere that kept me reading. The characters, especially Kama and his brother Ariz, feel super real. Their back-and-forth was funny at times, but also kind of emotional in a quiet way. You can tell there’s history between them, and that made me care about them more than I expected.But I gotta be honest... the chapters are long. Like, really long. I caught myself scrolling and scrolling, wondering when a scene would end. Don’t get me wrong, the writing is detailed and flows well, but I think it would help a lot if the chapters were broken into smaller parts. Not because the content is bad but because it’s a lot to take in all at once. Shorter chapters would make the pacing feel tighter and give each scene more punch.Also, there are some moments where things get a bit repetitive—like a character’s thoughts or reactions looping in similar ways—but that’s nothing a bit of trimming wouldn’t fix.Overall, though, I’m hooked. The slow reveal of the school’s weird vibe, the strange behavior of the teachers, and how Kama is just trying to stay low-key while getting pulled into something bigger? I’m totally here for it. Just… maybe give us a breather between the scenes next time ?
