The premise of this story is wonderful as well as the idea behind it. Perhaps it's just me but for some reason the writing comes off awkwardly. For example 'he asked interrogatingly' or 'he said assertively'. You use phrases like that consistently. If a question is asked usually it's automatically in an interrogative tone since an interrogation is just an official year for the questioning that the police do. Basically, it becomes a bit redundant in that aspect. There are also other things you can use to describe besides those adverbs. For instance instead of saying 'he said assertively', a phrase like he stated in a tone that made it clear he was serious. It's longer but it fits in and provides imagery. I am honestly not trying to Lecture of put you down because I think it's amazing to pursue your goals and consistently put in effort. It's just that I personally believe that I'd be doing an injustice by not saying anything because I truly like the premise of the book. It is a skillful blend of both modern and ancient to me.
