Lots of spelling, lexical and grammatical mistakes.. Sometimes it is hard to understand the meaning of the sentence, often misspelled he/she/his/hers, kind/king etc. A lot of repeatability, repeating words, repeatedly, saying the same again and again, then repeat it. Definitely needs an editor. Story development is something subjectively, it is a bit slow for my liking, but it is a good story and it could raise into something great, while character development is pretty good, yet not too fast or too deep, you can feel the characters and there is a lot of space left for their development. As for world background 45 chapters deep, I know almost nothing. It's some casual city [suggestion], guess it is something reader has to create while reading. As for stability of updates I have just started yesterday, seeing in early chapters in author notes saying (2 a day, then 10 a week, then 5 a week, 12,4,7,20,1... For god's sake couldn't it be juse when you have time even one a week would be enough if not announced 10 a week. Author (yes actually author) is writing 4-5 or maybe more idk. novels at the same time, not good enough quality even asking for donations under every single chapter. *I am quiting*. Please edit your plain texts, concentrate on one or two novels at a time, keep the good story and chapters, maybe add a single detail either on VR and real world and I will be more than happy to continue reading and donate.
