Alright, raw thoughts—no neat sections, just how it hit me as I read.The opening? Heavy. It immediately sets this grim, almost suffocating tone. Wang Zhu feels like someone who’s just waiting for the inevitable, like she’s already halfway gone, and Azi Fe is the only thing tethering her to existence. That contrast between them is what grabbed me. One’s resigned, the other refuses to let go. That’s compelling.The writing has this poetic, almost lyrical flow, which fits the mood, but sometimes it feels too polished, like real people don’t talk like this. Azi Fe especially—his words are intense, but they feel scripted at times, like he’s trying too hard to be profound. Maybe that’s intentional, maybe that’s just who he is, but it stood out.The weight of it all—Wang Zhu’s apathy, Azi Fe’s desperation—comes through strong, but I kept wondering: why is she like this? I get that she’s dying, that she’s accepted it, but I want to feel it more, not just be told. A small flashback, a moment of vulnerability—something to make her pain more hers rather than just a concept. Azi Fe, on the other hand, is fire. You feel his frustration, his refusal to let her fade, but I also wonder: is he fighting for her, or just because he doesn’t want to be alone? That would be an interesting layer.One worry: if the whole story keeps this level of intensity, it might get exhausting. Darkness hits harder when there are moments of contrast—whether that’s a memory of something beautiful or just a break in the tension. Right now, it feels like drowning with no chance to come up for air.But yeah, there’s something here. It has that tragic, doomed feel, like you know this won’t end well, but you still want to see how it plays out. I’d keep reading, just to see if Azi Fe can actually pull her back—or if he’s just delaying the inevitable.
